Spring Clean: Halfling Hullabaloo

This group of Halflings left their homes many generations ago and settled in their current home in a peaceful valley. For hundreds of years they remained hidden away in The Valley quietly growing their crops and raising animals. Then after a particular bumper harvest that caused the barns and storehouses to overflow with food and pipe-weed a few insane Halflings set out into the Big Folk World to try and find someone to sell some of it to. The rest of this lore takes place roughly in a Bronze Age.

After a few days of leisurely strolling through the countryside they came across a town of Men who they managed to sell most of the extra food to although far less food than they had hoped to sell, strolling is hungry work after all. The local ruler was fascinated by them and made the grievous mistake of inviting them into his home with the words “My Home is Your Home”. So taking him literally the Halflings stole anything that wasn’t nailed down, piled it into their carts and went off home the next day. When they arrived home the others were astonished, they had managed to get solid gold chalices, marble busts, fistfuls of jewels and even a wizard (bound and gagged) all for a few carrots and some pipe-weed. Over time the Wizard managed to forgive the Halfings for ‘buying’ him and even came to love the foul mouthed, thieving little Halflings and since they had something of a poor reputation in the wider world he was sent out as an emissary to try and mend what relationships he could.

When a few weeks later a group of Men presented themselves at the entrance to The Valley demanding the thieving Halflings return what they had stolen they were treated like bitter customers and turned away by the abusive and foul mouthed guards. The local ruler was so enraged that he placed a bounty on Halfling feet promising to pay by the pair.

Three travelling Giants operating as Mercenaries took up the challenge and went to The Valley to make a fortune in bounties but when they arrived at the (for a giant) narrow entrance they were peppered with stones and foul language. Enraged they smashed down the ‘Big Gate’ and found all the Halflings gathered in the centre of town, farm tools in hand. Just as the Giants were about to wipe out The Valley the Wizard returned, having heard the story of the Giants, and confronted them.

Just as the three turned to face him the sun rose behind the wizard and he harnessed it’s power to curse the Giants and turned all three to stone. Then he collapsed into a coma that would last many years.

Now the wider world had moved from Bronze to Iron but in The Valley nothing had really changed. The humans had become less hostile as time went on and eventually the bounty was forgotten about and trade began again, from the safety of outside the walls this time. The Dwarves emerged from their mountain holds and slowly began to grow fond of the Halfling pipe-weed which helped build an informal friendship between Halflings and Dwarves although again no Halfling was ever let within a mile of anything valuable he might “accidentally” mistake for payment.

The Halflings had little use for this new trend of making things from iron, except for their kitchen tools which they always kept upgraded with the finest metals, all Halfling society was still happily plodding along with Bronze ploughs, bronze weapons and bronze armour. The three Giants remained frozen in stone in the village square and were regularly decorated for festivals and parties. The wizard stayed in his coma and life went on without much changing.

All that changed with a world changing event (In Warhammer Fantasy this could be the Storm of Chaos basically every generic Fantasy World has an “Everything Changed” moment that I can plug into this part of the story). By this time humanity would be about the time of the Early Renaissance and the Men nearest to the Halflings would basically look like Spanish Conquistadors.

In my own little Fantasy World this would be the Kingdoms of Men finally starting to fail in their Wars against the Orcs and Goblins who start sneaking into the realms of humanity and plundering towns and villages. The Dwarves retreated to their Mountain Holds and none ever left them, all except for those Holds who had done long term trade with the Halflings. For reasons no one could explain small bands of Dwarves began to show up in The Valley armed and ready for War claiming they had come to defend their ‘Little Brothers’. The same was true for the towns of men, who also sought safety in their fortresses and cities however bands of adventurers, merchants guards and even a few knights trickled into The Valley drawn by a sense of duty and friendship.

Unknown to anyone the Halflings seemed to have a strange passive magical aura, no matter how foul mouthed or rude they were no one who dealt with them regularly could truly hate them. If you even had the tiniest seed of affection for them over time it would grow and grow until they became like family to you. This was why a wizard kidnapped and abducted quickly became extremely fond of the Halflings and why a rag tag mix of Humans and Dwarves felt obliged to come to the defence of The Valley.

Let me know what you think in the comments